This is an amazingly horrible film— even ignoring the fact that Jennifer Aniston his literally only three facial expressions that she is able to perform at any given moment (“Huh?”, “Mmhmm”, and “Ah”) and that Mark Wahlberg is not the best actor in the world either (sorry, folks), there’s so much to feast on here. The fact that it essentially makes a mockery of Rob Halford’s sexual orientation by playing to gay stereotypes is kind of disgusting; the fact that this movie also contains the most goofily dramatic multi-angle cut scene ever to depict someone FALLING DOWN A FLIGHT OF STAIRS is sort of amazing. This is the kind of film that won’t let you win, no matter how you approach it. It’s almost impeccably built to make you angry about how you chose to spend your time.
Stephen Jenkins from Third Eye Blind plays the rival cover band lead singer, and he tries so hard that it makes you want to think he is the best actor in this film just for showing up. (He isn’t.) On the one hand, I’m not sure why Judas Priest wasn’t like “fuck it just make a movie out of us and we’ll collect royalties”, it’s not like this movie depicts some sordid notion of hair metal or anything— if anything it makes The Dirt look like Trumpeter of the motherfucking Swan. I’m sure someone over there took a look at the script though and made the motion that dealers make at blackjack tables when they’re switching shifts with someone else (note: I have not looked up if they were ever actually approached to have their name attached formally to the film, so this is pure unfiltered ignorance you’re dealing with here).
The guy who plays Glenn in The Wedding SInger is in this, and he plays an asshole, just like he did in The Wedding Singer. For this reason of consistency alone, he is the best actor in this film.
Name: Larry Fitzmaurice